I often search Yahoo’s Answers forum for topics relating to Cheap Family Meals. This is an excellent resource for anything from recipes, to home buying or just simply interacting with millions of other people who actually walk in very similar shoes to your own. I was browsing cooking topics yesterday and somehow landed in the family and divorce forum where I read and responded to the most heart touching story.  A young Dad posted a question yesterday in regards to the care and custody of his little girl as his wife had just pasted away.  Now the little girl is only 1 and he isn’t the biological father, but has been the one to raise her since she was born. This 27 yr old widow now has to face the heartbreaking decision of letting the little girl go to her biological father or fighting to keep her. You really have to read his story to understand everything as I have just briefly skimmed over it. (the link is below)

I immediately responded to his story and then all night long I ponder both his question and my response. My oldest daughter was created before my marriage and she knows as much but my husband has raised her since she was 4 yrs. old.  If you asked her, he is and always will be her only dad. But as any parent in a similar situation knows, that doesn’t hold up in a court of law very well. When my husband suffered a heart attack a little over a year ago we starting discussing our plans if such a tragic event were to happen that took either of us from our children. It was only obvious if anything happened to him I would of course continue to raise our children but what wasn’t as obvious is what if something happened to me or to the both of us.

As a mother I have specify my wishes for the care of my children as I cannot predict fate but can only try to prepare for what it can throw at me.  Life has so many twists and turns and we have to account for such even though its not something we could even begin to imagine. In the story above, this widowed husband  has some life impacting decisions to make in the mist of grief and sorrow. He wants to follow his late wife’s wished but is unclear on what those are.

Mom’s / Dad’s make a plan just in case. Draw up a will or even just a sheet of paper that specifies your plans for your children in the event something tragic happens. Go to your local bank, school or phonebook and find a notary to get that sheet of paper notarized. Yes the subject is difficult and at best unimaginable but don’t leave one of life’s most important decisions for a grieving spouse or family member to try and figure out.

Here’s the link to the young widowed father’s story:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081202165913AAEDbrX&show=7
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