I don’t laugh nearly as much as I would like to. With the kids, hubby, house and bills my life seems so serious and complicated all the time. So I searched the net and found some funny little jokes because we all need a little laugh sometimes.

To the king of dumb blonde jokes, my husband, I dedicated this one to you:

Blonde GUY joke

There were two blonde guys working for the city. One would dig a hole; the other would follow behind him and fill the hole in. They worked furiously all day without rest, one guy digging a hole, the other guy filling it in again. An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn’t understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger, “I appreciate the effort you are putting into your work, but what’s the story? You dig a hole and your partner follows behind and fills it up again.” The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed, “Well, normally we are a three-man team, but the guy who plants the trees is sick today.”
Author: Unknown

Amie, you know you can relate to these:

Wife V/S Husband

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?” “Yep,” the wife replied, “in-laws.”

Author: Unknown

Words

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day… 30,000 to a man’s 15,000. The wife replied, “The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men. The husband then turned to his wife and asked, “What?”
Author: Unknown

To my Best Friend APS we know this one all too well:

Why are married women heavier

Because single women come home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed while married women come home see what’s in the bed and go to the fridge
Author: Unknown

And finally a few that I got a kick out of:

Questions –Author(s): Unknown

• Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
• Q. What’s a mixed feeling? A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.
• Q. What is a Yankee? A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
• Q: What’s the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? A: 45 pounds.
• Q: What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? A: 45 minutes.
• Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning? A. They don’t have balls to scratch.
• Q. What’s the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball? A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
• Q. What is the difference between “ooooooh”and “aaaaaaah”? A. About three inches.
• Q: What is the difference between medium and rare? A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Hope you enjoy these and e-mail me if you have any, I would love to hear from you.[ad#ad-6]

You ever noticed no matter how hard we try to remember the great moments in our children lives, we tend to mostly retain the not so great moments. Well with that said I was reminded today how rewarding motherhood can be during one of those great moments. I was checking one my e- mail accounts and as the home page was loading, I see this message sitting there with my daughter’s name on the subject line. Oh sh– what has she done was the first thing that came to my mind as I had received messages of such nature in the past. But to my surprise it was quite the opposite. It’s nice to know that teachers are paying more attention to the positive moments our kids do create daily whether it is big or small. It’s also nice to receive a little credit in parenting because every mommy out there knows credit is long overdue. Below is the message from my daughter’s teacher and just one final comment to my daughter “GIRLFRIEND YOU ROCK!”

Machelle

Hi my name is Mr. Vincent at XXXXXX Middle School. I am currently teaching your daughter Kourtnee in World Geography. Usually whenever a teacher contacts a parent is bad news, this is not the situation. To start off Kourtnee is one of a kind, and that is probably an understatement. I would just like to compliment you on raising a wonderful daughter. In class Kourtnee brings a lot of life and energy. What is unusual is the energy is only brought out when it is appropriate. The other day I asked her if she could help a student that sits behind her that is struggling and has a hard time with school. Kourtnee said she would and today during class she worked directly with that student and it was great because when another student can help her she does not feel embarrassed or overwhelmed. If you could let Kourtnee know how great she is doing I would appreciate it, and also thank you for teaching her how to do things like this.

Mr. Vincent

[ad#ad-6]

Being a mom of 4, I know first-hand how hard it is to 1 – get the house clean, 2- keep it clean, and 3- having some help with steps 1 and 2! I focus on the kitchen, living-room and bathroom daily (this is what the guest would see) with bedrooms and laundry getting done on the weekends. There are 3 of us capable of cleaning (o.k. 1 capable and 2 semi-capable) so we alternate the three rooms each day. Sunday is my wash day, I spend the whole day cleaning, folding and putting away and I split the bed-rooms with the other 2 (my oldest daughter just loves it HA!)
We use a chore chart to keep this all organized. Mom’s you have teach by example, meaning even if you have only had 2 hours sleep get your chore for the day done. That is the only way you can hold it over your husband and older children’s heads to help. Trust me I have been working on this for years. Also if you have to fill in and do someone’s chores because they are gone, make them take one of your days (teach ‘em early no free rides!)
Create charts for the little ones too. Mine include bed making, teeth-brushing and book reading on theirs. It not only makes them feel like big kids it also starts teaching responsibility young.
Check out DLTK’s Custom Chore Charts they have cool customizable charts that are free to create, save and print.
[ad#ad-6]